Dear Avery -- 5 weeks old

Dear Avery,

This weekend you will attend your second funeral. That's right. You have two great-grandmothers who chose to stay on this earth just long enough to know of your arrival and to experience the joy that you brought. Yes, my sweet girl, you have already brought so much joy to this earth.

Ma Doris died on your one-week birthday. She never got to meet you or hold you, but Zayde brought her your picture and you made her smile. I don't think she understood who you were, but she kissed you and loved you all the same. 

Ma Doris had a special saying. It wasn't something she said, though, until the late stages of her life. I guess it didn't come to her until she got old. As her mind drifted away and she got older and older, she said it more and more. At the end it was the only coherent thing she said at all. 

Not a lot of money but a lot of fun. 

This was a funny thing coming from Ma Doris, because there was a time when she actually did have a lot of money. But in the end, when logic and reason and even her own thoughts evaded her, she was left with only the lessons of life. And this is what she had to say, her message to us. The money never mattered. 

So I won't wish for riches for you, my sweet girl. Instead I'll wish for you a life that's rich with fun and happiness. I'll wish for you a life of joy.

Grandma Jane died two days ago. The picture above is of her when she was young. She never got to meet you either, but she knew that you were named for her. Avery Jane. And knowing that was better than a thousand presents. It was one of her greatest honors. I'm so proud of you for giving that to her. 

Daddy knows Grandma Jane a lot better than I do and I'm sure he'll tell you lots of stories about her. But here's what I know. She was strong. She was generous. And she knew how to love. How do I know? Because she brought eight children into this world. And a million grandchildren. And a countless number of great-grandchildren who will keep coming for many more years. She created a family. And this is her proof. If I had to describe her big family in one word, it would be this. Warm. And warmth doesn't just come by accident. It is something that is created only by strength, by generosity and by love. 

Daddy and I were proud to give you the name Jane. We know you'll carry her legacy and make her proud too. You already have. 

Technically the name Jane means by the grace of God. By the grace of God, Grandma Jane lived a beautiful life. By the grace of God, you, our sweet Avery Jane, came to us healthy and whole. By the grace of God, you were the little girl we always dreamed of. God's best gift, his perfect miracle. 

By the grace of God, you came to us. I am so blessed to be your mother. I love you so much.

Love, 

Mommy