Dear Avery -- 4 years old

Dear Avery – 4 years old

Hard to believe you are four. Some days it seems as though you are 14. You have the sassiness and mood swings of a teenager, and your favorite two songs at the moment are “Girls Just Want to Have Fun” and “Call me Maybe”. You insisted on getting your ears pierced for your 4^th birthday and did so without a single tear or flinch, but you absolutely refuse to let me pull back (or even brush) your hair . So your sparkling ears remain hidden. You are stubborn and strong-willed. You are a mini-me.

Still, though, you are my baby doll and always will be. You need reassurance every night that there are no fires, monsters or bugs in your room, and even after that, you spend most of your nights on the cot next to our bed where Mommy and Daddy are close. You request multiple kisses and hugs at drop-off at the gym and at school, and you know that a mother’s kiss cures all boo-boos. I am in no rush for you to grow up.

In spite of that, you are doing it a little bit day by day. You make this little thinking face when your wheels are turning. And they are turning all the time now. You have big ideas and are never shy to follow through. You started planning your birthday party back in July. We couldn’t take a trip to Target without carefully searching the party aisle for princess plates, pink napkins and favors for the goody bags. Never mind that we already had a stack of princess plates and pink napkins at home, and we were bursting with puzzles, pencils and notebooks, you wanted everything to be perfect…and well…you just wanted everything. You had pages and pages of guest lists – a boy page, a girl page, an adult page, etc. You originally had at least 35 kids on the list and every single one of them was truly and honestly your friend. What can I say? You are my sunshiney little social butterfly. 

You and I worked hard to plan the party. We were partners. We created,  printed, stuffed and stamped invitations, browsed and ordered the princess castle bouncy house and drew out the layout for your backyard bash. To say you were excited was an understatement.

In the end we had about 23 kids crammed into our playroom while our backyard soaked up all the rain. Yes, after all that planning and dreaming of a beautiful, colorful, crisp fall day, it rained and poured all over your parade. And do you know what you did? You LOVED it. There was never even one moment of disappointment. We completely pinked up our dining room and living room with tablecloths, balloons and streamers and we went with the flow. We set up the big wet bouncy house right outside the playroom door and Daddy helped pass kids back and forth. Some of the kids even enjoyed the big bubble table that you were so adamant about having. It was an ultimate lesson in being easy-going (something we focus on daily with you) and you passed with flying colors. I am so proud of you. You had the time of your life.

You are growing into such a big, beautiful, smart little girl. You can write your name, identify letters and sounds, count to 100 and add simple numbers. You read your first book recently and were so proud to read it again…and again…and again. You are passionate about books and love going to story hour at the library every week and picking out a whole pile to bring home with us. You even sleep with a whole basket of books in your bed. You love gymnastics and dance and you love to play soccer (especially with Daddy as your coach!) 

You absolutely love school, and I was so honored to accompany you as the parent volunteer last week. You are the mother hen of the class. I see how already at age 4 you are a leader -- marching to your own drum in your dress-up wedding gown. You marched and you sang until every other little girl in the class had on a princess dress and was marching along right behind you. You were the star of the show and you loved every second of it. You are such a pleasure to watch.

 People look up to you and I think they always will. You just have that quality about you. It is your gift. My wish for you (and my responsibility as your mother) is to make sure you always use that gift for the good. Do good and others will follow.  Be an up-stander, not a by-stander. Treat others kindly. Stay true to yourself. 

And always stay my baby doll.

Love,

Mommy

Dear Avery & Tyler -- my hopes and dreams for you

Dear Avery and Tyler,

I can't take credit for writing this but I came across it, and it brought tears to my eyes. These are my hopes and dreams for the both of you...

I hope I raise a child who says “thank you” to the bus driver when he gets off the bus, “please” to the waiter taking his order at the restaurant, and holds the elevator doors when someone’s rushing to get in.

I hope I raise a child who loses graciously and wins without bragging. I hope he learns that disappointments are fleeting and so are triumphs, and if he comes home at night to people who love him, neither one matter. Nobody is keeping score, except sometimes on Facebook.

I hope I raise a child who is kind to old people.

I hope I raise a child who realizes that life is unfair: Some people are born rich or gorgeous. Some people really are handed things that they don’t deserve. Some people luck into jobs or wealth that they don’t earn. Tough.

I hope I raise a child who gets what he wants just often enough to keep him optimistic but not enough to make him spoiled.

I hope I raise a child who knows that he’s loved and special but that he’s not the center of the universe and never, ever will be.

I hope I raise a child who will stick up for a kid who’s being bullied on the playground. I also hope I raise a child who, if he’s the one being bullied, fights back. Hard. Oh, and if he’s the bully? I hope he realizes that his mother, who once wore brown plastic glasses and read the phonebook on the school bus, will cause him more pain than a bully ever could.

I hope I raise a child who relishes life’s tiny pleasures—whether it’s a piece of music, or the color of a gorgeous flower, or Chinese takeout on a rainy Sunday night.

I hope I raise a child who is open-minded and curious about the world without being reckless.

I hope I raise a child who doesn’t need to affirm his self-worth through bigotry, snobbery, materialism, or violence.

I hope I raise a child who likes to read.

I hope I raise a child who is courageous when sick and grateful when healthy.

I hope I raise a child who begins and ends all relationships straightforwardly and honorably.

I hope I raise a child who can spot superficiality and artifice from a mile away and spends his time with people and things that feel authentic to him.

I hope I raise a child who makes quality friends and keeps them.

I hope I raise a child who realizes that his parents are flawed but loves them anyway.

Dear Tyler -- 2 1/2 years old

Dear Tyler,

My sweet, sweet boy. It is Saturday morning, otherwise known around here as Daddy Day. This is the day Daddy gets up at the crack of dawn (5:37 today to be exact) with you and your sister, and mommy gets to sleep in. I couldn't fall back to sleep today, though, so I am enjoying sipping my coffee and watching the news while the three of you are out getting munchkins and taking your weekly drive around town.

You turned 2 1/2 yesterday. You are so proud. You are getting smarter and sweeter by the day. You have started a class at the YMCA called "So Big", essentially a weekly 1-hour introduction to preschool. You enjoyed yourself the first Tuesday (and never took your new backpack off your back!) but when I told you this past Tuesday that you were going to "school" again your words were, "But I already did that!"

You make me laugh every day. On Wednesday this week Daddy was on a trip and I took you and Avery out for your favorite dinner -- grilled cheese and yogurt at Panera. You were your wild little self, jumping up and down in the booth, too busy to eat much of anything. In the bathroom we had a whole conversation about The Men's Room and The Ladies Room, all overheard by an older woman in the stall next to us who told me she wished she had a tape recorder. (Yes, sweetheart, your sister potty-trained you about 4 months ago. Three days and you were totally in underwear. You blew my mind with that one!) I explained that when you grow up and become a man you can go in the Men's Room like Daddy but for now you can come in the Ladies Room with Mommy. You told me that when I become a man I can go in the Men's Room too. Haha!!

Anyway we got back to the table and you were wild as ever. Somehow your pants starting to fall down and you and Avery thought it was just hysterical that your tiny little bum was hanging out. I quickly pulled your pants and underwear back up (sometimes I think you are too young to be potty-trained and wearing underwear!!) and you swiftly pulled them right back down all the way and not only mooned but FLASHED the entire restaurant.

Oh Tyler! Trying my damnedest not to laugh, I yanked the pants back up, took one last bite of my salad, stuffed your grilled cheese into my bag and piled up all our dishes with one arm while I carried your squirming 33-lb body in my other arm and quickly dropped our tray off and fled the scene. As we rushed out of there an old lady told me, "Oh honey, flashing is good." Haha!!!

We got into the car and you were quite devastated to learn that no, you did NOT earn your cookie.

Mortifying as it was, I know it was one of those mommy moments that I will look back on and smile. I know someday I will long for that sweet, clueless little boy who hadn't yet been taught one of life's important lessons. We both know you will never pull that stunt again, but I also know that you will never be quite that innocent and free and...well, clueless again either.

You are growing up fast, Tyler, and I want to savior all of it. At bedtime you always ask for a hug and a "mah" -- your word for a kiss. Lately you tell me you want a BIG one. Your wrap your little arms around my neck and squeeze with all your might. And then you stick your little lips to mine and say "mah" as loud and big as you can. It is my favorite moment of every day. I hope you always love me as pure and as big as you do now. I know I always will.

I love you so much sweet boy. MAH!!!!!!!

Love,
Mommy

Dear Tyler -- 2 years olds

Dear Tyler,

It seems like just yesterday you were this tiny little thing who used to curl up on my chest and sleep the day away. Now you are a running, jumping, singing, dancing happy little two-year-old boy. And you are every bit as sweet now as you were then (other than when you are kicking and screaming on the kitchen floor throwing a tantrum of course!)

Every day it seems you are doing or learning something new. You are talking in full sentences now. You substitute "L" for "S" so things like "lit down" and "I no lee it" might not be understandable to everyone but they are to me. We had our first snowstorm last week and the first words out of your mouth when I opened the curtains were, "I no lee no lowman."

The other morning I woke up to a loud thud. I ran to your room and threw open your door and there you were standing right there smiling and saying, "Hi mom." You had climbed out of your crib! I thought it might have been a fluke but you did it again the next morning. You were SO proud of yourself. You even got back it to show Vivi and I how you did it. You just threw your leg up over the top and pulled yourself right over and out. So we spent the morning making your big boy bed and practicing. Avery pretended to read you stories and tuck you in. You loved it! When it came time for naptime though, you didn't really understand that you actually had to sleep in your bed. But by nighttime you had figured it out. It's been about 3 or 4 successful days and nights now in your big boy bed so we took apart your crib today. You are officially a big boy!

Daddy and I gave you a toolbench for your birthday. You are obsessed with it. You love your tools more than anything. Sometimes you even sleep with your hammer or screwdriver. I think it's funny that your daddy was cursing his tools putting yours together. I'm not sure your love of tools comes from your father.

Your love of sports comes from your daddy though! You started your first sports class this week and you LOVED it. You were so proud to tell everyone you played soccer. You tried so hard to follow your teacher's directions but you got a little confused here and there. He told you to stand on your yellow circle. So you brought your yellow circle with you everywhere you went. Even when it was your turn to score a goal you had your yellow circle in hand. You are just too darn cute!

Halloween got postponed this year due to the big storm that knocked out all the power in our town. So we went trick-or-treating last night on your birthday. You thought it was all for you. You got the hang of ringing the doorbell and saying "trick-or-treat" but the very next words out of your mouth every single time were "open it". You just couldn't wait. As I pick through the candy stash now I see a lot of them have teeth marks through the wrapper. You love your candy.

Some other things you love these days -- doggies, Nana Pat's jam, Elmo, your lovey and blankie, firetrucks, cars, playing outside, vacuuming, getting your haircut, your playroom, cake, ice cream and anything sweet, your boots, wrestling with Daddy and your big sister. Things you hate -- broccoli, eggs and washing your face.

You are a true joy in every way and I love you more and more each day. Your smile truly lights up a room and your laugh is the sweetest sound I have ever heard in my life. You are such a wonderful little boy.

Love,

Mommy

Dear Avery -- 3 years old

Dear Avery (or Vivi as your brother calls you),

Today is your 3rd birthday. Where has the time gone? You are no longer a baby and barely a toddler. You are a full-grown 3-year-old child. And I love you more and more each day.

For your birthday you got a red balance bike from Nana Pat & Poppy, a sand table and hello kitty bathrobe from Nana & Papa, 5 new movies from Grammie & Zayde, and a dollhouse and soccer ball from me & Daddy. Of course you loved everything. When I asked which was your favorite your answer was "all". This morning we went to an indoor play place and bounced, climbed and slid all morning long. Daddy and I had just as much fun as you and your brother.

You are bouncing down the stairs in your new robe right now with your hair dripping wet, fresh from your tub asking both to be fed and to sit on my lap. Must finish later...

Ok, I bought myself a little more time while I make your requested birthday dinner (hot dogs & pasta with butter) by putting on your requested show (Calliou) and giving you and Tyler your requested snack (frozen waffle -- yes you love them frozen).

Let's see, things you love these days -- Dora, dolls, books, painting, play do, imaginary play, chicken nuggets, cake, ice cream, swinging, running, singing, dancing, going to school, getting your haircut and cuddling in. Things you hate -- getting your hair washed, waiting for anything, tags on your clothes and most vegetables. Oh and sleeping past 5am (yes, you are still up multiple times a night.)

You started school a few weeks ago and you love it. Your teachers are Mrs. Donahue and Mrs. Glaser. You love going and are SO exhausted when you come home. Those are your longest nap days. You love singing your ABC's and recently told Daddy that you want to dance to that song with him at your wedding. He might just hold you to it. You do get J and K mixed up but it's so cute the way you sing it that I haven't really tried to correct you too much. You've gotten really good at counting and can get to about 12 without getting mixed up. I think that's pretty good! You can identify almost all of the letters and sounds and are very interested in what things spell. You also know all of your shapes (even oval and crescent!), your colors, days of the week (in no particular order) and months of the year. Recently you were at a Ms. Madgical show at the gym and another mom said to me "Your daughter knew is was September, wow!!!" I told her it was because your birthday was this month but really it's just because you are so smart!! I am amazed by you every single day.

Daddy and I think you are going to be an athlete. You certainly are built like one. You are so tall and strong and solid. Sometimes we run the track at the gym. You love it but your brother sometimes tries to run the elevator instead so we don't do it too often anymore. But a few weeks ago you ran a whole mile!!!! 15 full laps around that track. I was SO PROUD of you. My 3-year-old track star. Some day you'll get to run in a real race, I promise.

You have filled me with more joy in the last 3 years than I ever could have imagined. I will spend the rest of my life trying to repay you for that. I love you so much my sweet girl. Happy Birthday.

Love,

Mommy

Dear Avery -- 2 years old

Dear Avery,

I write this with a bittersweet heart. You are no longer my baby. You are my toddler, my big girl, my child. You have grown into your own. You have a personality (and a strong one at that) with your very own opinions, likes and dislikes, interests and sense of humor. You have your own agenda and stand your ground at all times. You love chocolate chip cookies, coupons, Elmo, the backyard swing and your handsome little brother. You can jump, gallop, walk frontwards down the stairs, count to 7, sing happy birthday and identify a handful of letters. You speak in full sentences and recently told me that you are a genius. Your favorite birthday gifts were your roller coaster, kitchen and doctor's kit. You got two shots today and didn't cry one tear.

I could never fully put into words how proud I am of you.

I have now officially graduated from the 2 under 2 club. As challenging as it was (and it WAS challenging) I think I will honestly look back on it as the most wonderful time in my life. I LOVED LOVED LOVED having 2 under 2. I will miss it. But of course I look forward to my "babies" growing up together.

Can I still call you my baby for a little while longer? My favorite time of day is before nap-time when my two babies crawl into my lap and I read you stories and rock you both in the glider. You and your brother giggle and play and we rock and read and cuddle. I cherish those moments

Before bedtime we read Goodnight Moon every single night (by your request) and then we say our prayers. You have a favorite of those too. You call it "cake" since there is a picture of a birthday cake on the page. It is the Irish blessing that was recited during our wedding ceremony and it will always be my prayer for you.

May green be the grass you walk on

May blue be the skies above you

May pure be the joys that surround you

May true be the hearts that love you.

I love you sweet girl. Happy Birthday.

Love,

Mommy

Dear Tyler -- 6 months old

Dear Tyler,

Today is Mother's Day. I know in theory this day is meant for children to thank their mothers for all they do. Well I'd really like to say thank you to you. You make being a mother the easiest, most wonderful thing in the world.

Honestly, you are the EASIEST baby. You go to sleep happy (totally on your own.) You wake up happy. You love the stroller. You love the car. You love the high chair. You love tummy time. You love to eat. I really can't think of anything you don't love. You don't complain. Ever. (well except when your big sis takes your toys away of course.) You are sitting up all on your own now and trying really hard to crawl. You love being tickled under your armpits. You love watching Daddy dance. You love when Avery jumps all over you. And of course you love your mommy.

As for poopy diapers, 5am feedings, spit-up and drool, all I can say is this -- my pleasure. Taking care of you and Avery is my greatest pleasure in life.

I am so blessed to be your mother.

Love,

Mommy